Friday, January 19, 2007

Marie Claire & Esquire: Sex Survey Results

You may have heard that Marie Claire and Esquire magazines conducted a How We Have Sex Now opposed to how we had it in previous eras. Some of the stats seemed predictable, and naturally some were a bit of a surprise. So just in case you missed the revealing news, we're sharing it with you here. Where do you fit in? How do these stats stack up against your reality? We'd love to hear back from YOU with your thoughts. We know you want to :) Read on...

The act is as old as mankind itself—but Internet porn and the sex swing are significantly newer. So Esquire teamed up with Marie Claire magazine to commission a candid, modern survey of America's sexual habits, desires, and taboos. Here, the salacious data…

How many times a week do you have sex?

5 times or less 90%

6 to 9 times 5%

10 times or more 5%

On average 2.6 times


5 times or less 94%

6 to 9 times 5%

10 times or more 2%

On average 2.3 times

Single men in monogamous relationships have a lot more sex than married men (4.5 times versus 2.7 times per week, or 66% more). The more money men make, the more sex they have, but the men who have the most sex—more than 15 times a week—make less than $100,000 a year.
What are you using in bed?
Vibrator 48%
Food 46%
Restraints or handcuffs 35%
Blindfold 30%
Butt plug or anal beads 17%
Whip 14%
Gag 12%
Sex swing or the "Wedge" 10%

How long are you waiting for it?

The average number of dates before having sex is 3 for men and 5 for women.

Men are more likely to have waited until marriage to have sex: 14% say they waited, while only 9% of women held out.

What's the longest you've gone without it?

Men's average: 19 months

Women's average: 16 months

35% of both men and women have gone without sex for more than 1 year, and 13% of men and 7% of women have gone without it for 5 years or more.

How many partners have you had in your lifetime?

Men's average: 14

Women's average: 11

About 40% of men and women have had fewer than 5 partners in their lifetime; 10% of men and 5% of women have had 50 or more partners.

How often do you pleasure yourself?

Men: 4.9 times per week

Women: 2.8 times per week
15% of men have paid for sex (and another 10% say they'd try it); only 1% of women have done so.

Are you more willing to sacrifice sex or sleep?

61% of women say they'd rather lose sex.

65% of men would rather give up sleep.

When stressed, women are less likely to want sex—about half of men feel the same way.

The Act
What do you want more of?

Women:Erotic massage Runner-up: Kissing
Men: Blow jobs Runner-up: Erotic massage

32% of men want more anal sex; only 6% of women agree—the biggest disparity of any act.

What are your favorite positions?

Women: Missionary (31%), with doggy style a close second (27%)

Men: Doggy style (31%), followed by woman on top (29%)

Least favorite positions:

Women: Reverse cowgirl (only 2% said it was their favorite)

Men: Tie, reverse cowgirl and spooning (5%)

Republican men prefer the woman on top; Democrats prefer doggy style.

What are your biggest fears when having sex with someone for the first time?


1. HIV

2. My performance

3. STD (other than HIV)

4. Pregnancy

5. Emotional entanglement

6. The wrath of God

7. Partner's performance


1. HIV

2. STD (other than HIV)

3. Pregnancy

4. My performance

5. Emotional entanglement

6. The wrath of God

7. Partner's performance

1 in 4 men and women say HIV is their biggest fear when having sex for the first time with a new partner, yet nearly the same percentage say they never use a condom when having sex for the first time with a new partner.

How do you feel after a one-night stand?

Men: Satisfaction. Men are more than 3 times as likely as women to feel satisfied.

Women: Regret. Women are more than 2 times as likely to feel regret or shame.

Where did you meet your current partner?

14% of men and 11% of women met their current sex partners online—more than bars, parties, and dating services combined

60% of men surf the Net for porn (more than 75% of single men between 25 and 34). About 25% spend more than 3 hours a week doing it.

17% of women surf the Internet for porn; 11% spend more than 3 hours a week doing it. 32% of men and 14% of women have looked at porn at work.

Has technology helped or hindered your sex life?

59% of men and 52% of women with BlackBerrys, PDAs, or cell phones say these devices have enhanced (rather than infringed on) their sex lives. 34% of men and 29% of women say they've used the devices to instigate sex.

Republicans use text messaging to initiate sex more often than Democrats.

On average, how much time per week do you spend surfing the Net for porn?,

Men: 2.6 hours

Women: 1.5 hours

Have you slept with someone in hopes of professional gain?


Yes, and it worked 6%

Yes, but it didn't work 3%

No 92%


Yes, and it worked 2%

Yes, but it didn't work 2%

No 96%

12% of men and 7% of women have answered a work call or e-mail during sex.

How loyal are you?

80% of women say they're in a monogamous relationship, while only 66% of men say they are.
Have you cheated?

49% of men say it's conceiv¬able that they will cheat on their partners (or already have) compared with 34% of women; for married men it's 47% and married women 35%.

Trimmed or waxed but not bare: 55%;

completely absent: 24%;

all natural: 22%

What women actually do:
Women in their 20s:

66% trimmed or waxed but not bare, 18% bare, 16% all natural

Women in their 30s:

64% trimmed or waxed but not bare, 25% all natural, 11% bare

Women in their 40s:

50% trimmed or waxed but not bare, 45% all natural, 5% bare

What women want men to do:

Trim: 50%

Go all natural: 45%,

Take it all off: 4%

What men actually do:

Go all natural: 55%

Trim: 40%

Take it all off: 4%

Republicans prefer their partners' pubic hair to be all natural, while Democrats prefer a trim.

What do you consider off-limits for your partner?


Having sex with a prostitute 84%

Exchanging sexually charged e-mails 63%

Massage with a happy ending 56%

Flirting 49%

Getting a lap dance 37%

Going to a strip club 31%

Looking at porn 20%


Having sex with a prostitute 97%

Exchanging sexually charged e-mails 83%

Massage with a happy ending 77%

Flirting 59%

Getting a lap dance 59%

Going to a strip club 43%

Looking at porn 28%

The most powerful aphrodisiac is


looks 38%

Wealth 5%

Power 4%

Wit 11%

Intelligence 17%

Kindness 26%


looks 17%

Wealth 2%

Power 6%

Wit 15%

Intelligence 18%

Kindness 43%

Looks are most important to women in their 20s and least important to women in their 40s. Intelligence in a partner is least important to married women and women who earn $100,000 or more. Meanwhile, men who earn more than $100,000 care more about partners' looks than poorer men.

Methodology: This survey was conducted exclusively for Esquire and Marie Claire magazines by Beta Research Corporation, an independent firm located in Syosset, New York. The 1,738 respondents were randomly selected and are a representative national sample of American men and women ages 21 to 49. They completed the online survey between October 24, 2006, and November 1, 2006. Because of rounding, some percentages may not add up to 100.

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